If you have participated in my presentations/courses you know that I am most often the last to give up hope. I am the one who says over and over again that we need to look for the moments of lucidity, and take full advantage of the times when our patients and loved ones with dementia are a resemblance of their former self. So today I saw it, again, firsthand. A woman who I’d basically written off, told her family she was not going to regain any of her thinking skills, and told all of the staff that the compensation system we had in place was all we could do, proved me wrong.
I saw her spark come back a couple of weeks ago, and to my dismay that light remains consistent even now. A few months ago, when I first met her, she told me that if I just gave her time she would feel better and recover. I persisted with therapy then, and I failed. She was correct. Now, it seems like she has shed about 10 years. Today we had a wonderful conversation. She laughed, smiled, and discussed her life with a precision and simplicity that made me know this was improvement. She also gave me some insight that was very valuable. Listen to your patients. Sometimes even when they seem off base and confused if we can listen to what they are truly saying, and realize that our goals and our time frame is not always what best suits them.
By leaving my preconceived notions behind and remembering that we all know ourselves better than any medical professional could, I am able to see the value in reading beyond the uncertainty of dementia. We have a responsibility to help our people live their best lives for as long as possible. How can we possibly begin to do that if we don’t use what they know to our advantage? Use their moments of clarity, find some resolution for yourself, and consider what we are here for. Reflect on our purpose of helping the elderly exist in a way that makes keeps life normal.
Monday, November 29, 2010
Sunday, November 28, 2010
Seniors and Holiday Woe
The holiday season can be extremely hard for many. I know that I tend to remember holidays of years past, long to be with my family, and miss loved ones who have passed on. I also have a real distaste for the commercial aspect and the mass amount of consumerism that plays into the holiday season in our culture. Not to mention that we lose focus on taking care of our physical self as we spend time running here to there, shopping, visiting, and experiencing the hustle and bustle. While I know that many people are inspired by the sights, the sounds, and the aromas. You have to admit that the amplified energy levels this time of year creates can be difficult, even for the most avid holiday enthusiast. Many factors come into play, sadness, loneliness, financial stress, time crunches, or sensory overload and they all take a toll.
Seniors are very susceptible to depression associated with the holidays. Just think about it from their perspective…
An elderly widow, we’ll call her Sue, lives at home alone and her children and grandchildren are coming to visit. This year Sue has been feeling less motivated to get prepared than ever. Maybe it’s because she is coming very close to that 80 year mark, or maybe it is just because she has recently stopped driving. Sue is worried that she won’t have all of the necessary food, presents, and amenities that her family is used to when they arrive for their traditional 4 day visit, but what could she have done, she has to rely on neighbors for a ride to the store, or she has to use the senior bus, and it is not easy to be prepared and remember all you need on the occasional bus trip. Plus the stores are so crowded and big that she can’t find anything. Her kids are bringing the dinner, they tell her not to worry about anything, but this makes Sue feel inadequate. Do they think she is not capable? What will be next, if she can’t drive and can’t cook dinner when will they decide she is too feeble to be alone? The last thing Sue wants is to have to move into one of those places for old people. They arrive, her kids, grandkids, a pet dog, they bring presents and food. Sue’s entire routine is changed. Sue is so grateful to have her family with her, happy they are willing to travel and share their time, but she is exhausted before they even arrive, and by the end of the visit, she feels like she could fall over from fatigue. Can you see how this might lead to the holiday blues? Can you see how Sue might have conflicted feelings as she is appreciative and thankful to have this time with her family, but she also is so out of her own routine that she begins to sense anxiousness and worry?
Seniors are very susceptible to depression associated with the holidays. Just think about it from their perspective…
An elderly widow, we’ll call her Sue, lives at home alone and her children and grandchildren are coming to visit. This year Sue has been feeling less motivated to get prepared than ever. Maybe it’s because she is coming very close to that 80 year mark, or maybe it is just because she has recently stopped driving. Sue is worried that she won’t have all of the necessary food, presents, and amenities that her family is used to when they arrive for their traditional 4 day visit, but what could she have done, she has to rely on neighbors for a ride to the store, or she has to use the senior bus, and it is not easy to be prepared and remember all you need on the occasional bus trip. Plus the stores are so crowded and big that she can’t find anything. Her kids are bringing the dinner, they tell her not to worry about anything, but this makes Sue feel inadequate. Do they think she is not capable? What will be next, if she can’t drive and can’t cook dinner when will they decide she is too feeble to be alone? The last thing Sue wants is to have to move into one of those places for old people. They arrive, her kids, grandkids, a pet dog, they bring presents and food. Sue’s entire routine is changed. Sue is so grateful to have her family with her, happy they are willing to travel and share their time, but she is exhausted before they even arrive, and by the end of the visit, she feels like she could fall over from fatigue. Can you see how this might lead to the holiday blues? Can you see how Sue might have conflicted feelings as she is appreciative and thankful to have this time with her family, but she also is so out of her own routine that she begins to sense anxiousness and worry?
So what do we do?
The Mayo Clinic reports the top 3 triggers for holiday stress are relationships, finances, and physical demands. Sue is burdened by all of these. Many seniors are in this position, and even if they have no issues with money, even if their family takes care of every aspect of the physical load, everyone has to cope with the relationships (or lack thereof) which is an undercurrent of the season. So we need to simplify the whole process. Slow down. Focus on contact, interaction, and connection. Make the seniors in your life realize just how much love surrounds them during this holiday season.
The Mayo Clinic reports the top 3 triggers for holiday stress are relationships, finances, and physical demands. Sue is burdened by all of these. Many seniors are in this position, and even if they have no issues with money, even if their family takes care of every aspect of the physical load, everyone has to cope with the relationships (or lack thereof) which is an undercurrent of the season. So we need to simplify the whole process. Slow down. Focus on contact, interaction, and connection. Make the seniors in your life realize just how much love surrounds them during this holiday season.
Photo Courtesy of Mimi_K http://www.flickr.com/photos/mimk/2117234691/
Sunday, November 14, 2010
November 16th: National Memory Screening Day
The Alzheimer’s Foundation of America is holding its annual National Memory Screening Day this upcoming Tuesday.
A screening is not a diagnosis, or in-depth testing, but a systematic way to look at areas of concern and determine if you or your loved one is at risk for dementia. It is also a great way to examine memory right now. Even if you are not having trouble the screen is helpful for future comparisons.
More than 2,000 locations nationally will provide the opportunity on Tuesday, November 16th for memory screening. Click on the link below for more detials.
A screening is not a diagnosis, or in-depth testing, but a systematic way to look at areas of concern and determine if you or your loved one is at risk for dementia. It is also a great way to examine memory right now. Even if you are not having trouble the screen is helpful for future comparisons.
More than 2,000 locations nationally will provide the opportunity on Tuesday, November 16th for memory screening. Click on the link below for more detials.
http://nationalmemoryscreening.org/index.php
Take this opportunity and screen your parents’ memory, your grandparents’, and your memory. This valuable service could help for earlier diagnosis of dementia, and guess what…the medical treatment available right now for Alzheimer’s and other types of dementias is MOST EFFECTIVE in early stages. So why wait?
Take this opportunity and screen your parents’ memory, your grandparents’, and your memory. This valuable service could help for earlier diagnosis of dementia, and guess what…the medical treatment available right now for Alzheimer’s and other types of dementias is MOST EFFECTIVE in early stages. So why wait?
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