Travel Time

Airplanes, airports, flight schedules, delays, and diversions; they all make for interesting traveling. As I sat in the airport last night I watched an elderly couple make their way through the madness.

We enter the security checkpoint at approximately the same time. I am in no rush, so behind the couple I stay, watching as they fumble around with their bags. I have it down to a science now, so it baffles me when others enter with no clue. The wife removes liquids and proceeds to dig through her purse taking out some makeup items. She can't maneuver her luggage. Pulling the bag is ok, but when it's time to lift, her companion takes over. Good thing he's there with the muscle I think to myself. The husband removes some items, and to his dismay he has to ditch the Sam's Club size Barbasol. Then their bags go through the scanner, they move one duffle type bag forward and back, repeat, call another agent over to look. Coins are the culprit. One gallon size zip-lock storage bag and one quart size, filled to the brim with coins. Off to the corner searching station they go and I lose sight for a moment, but can hear the man exclaiming that he can't possibly comprehend why coins pose a problem. Ok, so now I'm thinking that confusion with the whole security process could happen to anyone, but I am keeping my eyes and ears peeled in case they run into problems. These seniors aren't too savvy in the traveling department.

Delays and cancellations keep arising. I see the couple sitting at another gate. By this time the lady is sitting, her husband is pacing. He walks to the monitors, back to his wife, and to the monitors again. There are no attendants at the counter. Status change announcements blare over the intercom. Out of desperation the man walks my direction. I suppose I appear elderly friendly. He can't understand what is happening or what's going to come of his itinerary. They need to get to a larger airport and with the delays he won't make his connection. So he shows me the tickets, and when I begin to explain he asks that I talk to his wife as well. We venture across the room, and I launch into a discussion of time zones, standby lists, etc. I am fortunate that the wife understands fully. Her husband is relying on her reasoning skills to make this trip happen.

All flights were cancelled last night, so they went home to rest, while I tried not to think about the possibility that they were driving around in the foggy, dark, stormy weather. I imagine he drove & she navigated. The brawn and the brains had to work as a team. This morning I didn't see them, but hopefully with improving weather this man and wife will experience a flawless trip, much like myself.

So this brings me to my point. We take for granted the ease at which we can problem solve, shift gears and come up with an alternative. Airports can be pretty unfriendly, and I have seen some moments of terrible customer service when flying. I wonder how many elderly would report that flying is difficult for them? What might make it a more pleasant event? What services could benefit the aging population in the industry of travel?

Moments of Clarity

If you have participated in my presentations/courses you know that I am most often the last to give up hope. I am the one who says over and over again that we need to look for the moments of lucidity, and take full advantage of the times when our patients and loved ones with dementia are a resemblance of their former self. So today I saw it, again, firsthand. A woman who I’d basically written off, told her family she was not going to regain any of her thinking skills, and told all of the staff that the compensation system we had in place was all we could do, proved me wrong.

I saw her spark come back a couple of weeks ago, and to my dismay that light remains consistent even now. A few months ago, when I first met her, she told me that if I just gave her time she would feel better and recover. I persisted with therapy then, and I failed. She was correct. Now, it seems like she has shed about 10 years. Today we had a wonderful conversation. She laughed, smiled, and discussed her life with a precision and simplicity that made me know this was improvement. She also gave me some insight that was very valuable. Listen to your patients. Sometimes even when they seem off base and confused if we can listen to what they are truly saying, and realize that our goals and our time frame is not always what best suits them.

By leaving my preconceived notions behind and remembering that we all know ourselves better than any medical professional could, I am able to see the value in reading beyond the uncertainty of dementia. We have a responsibility to help our people live their best lives for as long as possible. How can we possibly begin to do that if we don’t use what they know to our advantage? Use their moments of clarity, find some resolution for yourself, and consider what we are here for. Reflect on our purpose of helping the elderly exist in a way that makes keeps life normal.